What’s your purpose?

I'm still figuring this one out, but I believe my purpose is to help others. I want to uplift, empower, motivate, and inspire minority women to reach their own success. I think many of us think that we achieved everything all on our own. It's true we did the majority of the work, but I'm sure you received some help along the way, even if it was something as simple as a mentor giving you advice or someone taking the time to give you an opportunity. I think we would achieve so much more in the community if we worked collectively more often.

What has been your biggest adjustment from childhood to adulthood?

I think my biggest adjustment is learning that life doesn't always pan out the way they do in our dreams. People don't live forever, rent is high, and people can be ruthless. My timeline for having my dreams fulfilled were very unrealistic. I wasn't spoiled so I know it takes hard work to get what you want and I like being able to pay for my own things; even though sometimes I rather buy shoes then pay a bill on time, but when will I get "there"?? I like to be on a schedule, but I've been embracing and enjoying the journey to wherever "there" may be and building tough skin along the way.

What are you most afraid of? Why?

Death.

I witnessed it so much as a child that it's engraved in my head. Any little sickness or scratch sends me into a panic in spite of the fact that I'm completely healthy. Well except for those damn migraines I've suffered from since I was a child. One day I feel like my head might explode in my sleep. And when would someone find me? The thought of dying alone is even worse.

Oh and the thought of leaving something like the iron on totally freaks me out. What if something bad happens on my account? The anxiety kicks in. The need to control every aspect of my well-being (and those around me) overwhelms me.

I know.
I have issues.
Not afraid to admit it.
LOL
I have to laugh at how crazy I sound typing this.
But it's me.



Trust

I will trust you until you do me wrong, and then I'll probably find a way to trust you again. I believe in the good in all people even those that have broken that trust. But I don't trust anyone to teach me how to swim. Not even my best friend. I don't trust the dark. I don't trust myself sometimes. I know the door is locked but i'll check it again. And again.  Somehow I still trust those dreamin eyes of yours.

And I trust that my heart will beat again.

What did your first love teach you?

Does 15 year old love really count? At that age I thought it was real so I'll go with it. My first love taught me that you can't judge a book by it's cover. Underneath the baggy clothes and rough exterior he had a heart of gold. He was a writer too. Always writing me letters and poetry. He would do anything for me. I know I was young, but I just knew that boy loved me. LOL He always showed it. So I know that when you love someone, you can't just say it. Love is taking action. Love is working together. Of course things didn't work out between us but he taught me to always support my words with my actions.

Now if we fast forward a few years later to senior year in HS…or should this one count as the first? I'll tell you anyway. :) I fell madly in love with a guy that I dated on and off until about sophomore year of college. It was a crazy ride. Our relationship started out great, but it became so unhealthy. There was jealousy and a lack of trust after I moved away to college. I began to learn more about who he was, and some of the issues I wasn't mature enough to process at the time.  The timing was not ideal. I was ready to explore college and he was ready for a long-term committed relationship. That was my first experience with a long distance relationship, and it didn't end well at all. But I did learn that everyone has different needs, and everyone loves differently. And what he needed I couldn't provide for him, and I'm glad I was able to walk away from the situation before it deteriorated even more. 

What’s a body goal that you’d like to reach? Address it then make a plan to reach it and set a start date here

Well I suppose adding on a few pounds wouldn't hurt, lol! But I don't really have a body goal. But I would like to exercise more. I am so lazy when it comes to working out. Thank God I have great metabolism. But working out is a great stress reliever and can prevent certain health issues. So I do need to make a set plan for exercising and yoga. I've been slacking. Ok so my goal is to work out at least twice a week. That's a good starting point, right? I will start on Monday, Nov. 18th. Hold me to it!
I had the pleasure of seeing the Robert Glasper Experiment in concert and words cannot explain how good it was. They are incredibly talented musicians!! I'm such a huge fan. Please support real music. Go. Now.




Robert Glasper on piano; Casey Benjamin on alto sax.